RAY: Hey there "True Stories" listeners. Joining me in the studio today is none other than Dr. Carl Spagootz, world-renowned MAZE artist.
CARL: Hello, there.
RAY: It's says here, Carl, that you hail from Basketcatch, Canada...
CARL: That's right...
RAY: ... and it also says that you "found an intense passion for maze-drawing since you were 4 years old. " Wow, what can I say about that? Carl, welcome to the studio.
CARL: Oh, yeah. Thanks so much, eh.
RAY: Carl, for our readers out there, what can you tell them about MAZES?
CARL: Well, that's a good question there. You see, a maze is a complex tour puzzle in the form of a complex branching passage through which the solver must find a route, okay? Not to be confused with a labyrinth, which, I mean, there's a HUGE difference in those, eh. See, a labyrinth possesses an actual through-route and isn't designed, really, to be difficult to navigate, despite the common uses of the word to indicate various complex, confusing structures.
RAY: Hmm, I see. So anyway, Carl -- you're from Canada.
CARL: That's right.
RAY: I have to ask -- have you ever met Geddy Lee?
CARL: Uh, no, I'm sorry, actually. I don't even know who that is, eh.
RAY: You ... you what?
CARL: Oh, uh ... I's just sayin I never heard of him before, eh. Is he into mazes or somethin?
RAY: Yeah, maybe mazes of incredibly complicated prog rock!
CARL: I don't follow.
RAY: Do you really not know who Geddy Lee is?
CARL: No.
RAY: GEDDY LEE -- lead singer and bass player for the famous hard-rock power-trio RUSH?
CARL: Uh, noo. Sorry.
RAY: You gotta be fucking kidding. You mean to tell me that you're actually from Canada ... and you don't know who RUSH is? It's the only good thing about Canada other than hockey!
CARL: Well, sorry, eh. Jeeze-oh-Pete! Just cuz I don't know who some band is!
RAY: Right. Gimme one sec here.
CARL: I mean, that's no reason to get all ... hey -- what are you doing there?? Hey! Hey!!! What's this all aboot!??? What the hell is this all abooot?
RAY: Now you die, syrup-man.
CARL: Hey, don't do that, eh! ... No!!!!
[end transmission]
Well ... I kinda just shot Carl in his face, so... Anyway, here -- go do this puzzle. Print out a copy and send me your results. I gotta go do some stuff.
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TRUE STORIES AWESOME MAZE-OF-THE-WEEK BONUS EXTRAVAGANZA!!!
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